Every Memory
by DiRTy-LaRrY
Summary: [oneshot AxC KxL MxM] Athrun, Kira and Murrue reminisce on old memories, and what those memories left behind. They remember the people, the places, and think about the spaces and the loss created in their hearts. [partial songfic to Nickelback Photograp


**I in no way own Gundam Seed or the song "Photograph" by Nickelback. I do, however, own this fiction and plagiarising-that is, stealing or copying segments-from it will incur my wrath. Not that that's a lot…but you will incur wrath, and THEN you're in for it! P Thus, if you want to take segments from this story-don't. If you want to get ideas from the story, at least give me a message to tell me so I know, and I can review some for you, and as well please acknowledge which story you the idea from.**

**PS: I don't expect anything really…because this isn't that good a fic-you can't get that many ideas from it.**

**Every Memory**

The Justice Gundam floated in space, the ruin of Junius 7 a suspended object lying in the thick liquid of space. It was unbearable, choking, smothering him, to see the place he'd called home, an empty wasteland, hanging weightlessly in space.

"It was here. That was where our home was. I think." The Justice' hand rose, slowly, ever so slowly, and pointed at a spot on the barren space colony. Space seemed to hold him back, and the tears he felt-they re-emerged, immersing him in a void full of nothingness and sorrow.

_And this is where I went to school_

_Most of the time had better things to do_

_Criminal record says I broke in twice_

_I must have done it half a dozen times_

"That was the school. I went there after I'd met Kira. This was where I met my other Coordinator friends." Athrun reminisced silently, all these tiny events playing in his mind like theatrical masterpieces that he alone couldn't bear to watch. The empty spaces they'd left in his heart were hollows in his heart devoid of happiness. All the death wrapped him in a blanket of sorrow as he remembered the names of people who he'd met, who he'd been friends, who he'd never see again.

"Most of the time, we were imagining and daydreaming. We were little kids. We had nothing better to do. We always were the powerful knights in shining armour, and we'd defeat the evil villains…" Athrun smiled bitterly. "If I was the knight in shining armour, why do I feel that I haven't defeated the evil villains yet?"

_I wonder if it's too late_

_Should I go back and try to graduate_

_Life's better now then it was back then_

_If I was them I wouldn't let me in_

"I never finished my education. At 14, I left to join ZAFT. I became an Ace pilot, and I spent the whole war declaring the glory of ZAFT and killing the people who threatened the existence of me, my father, my people." Athrun looked up and the wreckage of the destroyed Junius 7. "I fought because of this. I killed because of this. I followed orders to wipe out people who thought just like me. Were they evil? No. They weren't. They were just…innocent people, forced into those situations, and I killed them. _I killed them._"

"I wish it were the same. I wish I was there. I wish there was peace. I wish…I wish none of this had happened." The tears were rolling down, into his helmet, wetting his flight suit. And beside him, Cagalli, wrapped in her flying suit, slowly embraced Athrun, and cried with him.

* * *

"This was where it was. That's what the computer said. I'm sorry it ever happened." Kira Yamato looked out into the empty space, the space which had consumed, and left no trace of his former home, Heliopolis. It'd broken into separate pieces after the attack, and

_Every memory of looking out the back door_

_I had the photo album spread out on my bedroom floor_

_It's hard to say it, time to say it_

_Goodbye, goodbye_

"It'll never be the same."

"Why?"

"Because there's a space in there, waiting to be filled, and it can't be, won't ever be filled, because the innocence of my youth which would allow me to ignore all the details that I take in as a soldier, it's been taken away."

"Space?"

"Yes. A space. It's because I fought. I took lives. I ended stories. I put sorrow into people's hearts. In theory I shouldn't exist."

"But you are."

"Yes."

And in Kira's mind, a little photo frame of two boys standing in a park, and a little mechanical bird transforms, and the frame falls, and smashes, and the photo is stained with blood. The blood of a hundred, a thousand people, cry out in agony, their spirits torn from their bodies brutally, and violently. The two boys are holding their hands out, trying to block the terrible clamour, but to no avail.

Kira is one of those boys.

"I will never be Kira Yamato, computer engineer, ever again. No matter how hard I try. I've shed blood. I'm a mobile suit pilot. The only thing I can do now is use my abilities to protect people instead of hurting people with them. I won't let those spaces engulf me. I'll overcome everyone to attain peace."

Kira turned to Lacus, who sat beside him, and smiled at her.

"Let's go home, Kira."

"Let's."

* * *

Murrue Ramius looked at the picture in front of her, of her and a man, dressed in uniform, the two rather red in the cheeks, taken by surprise when somebody had snuck a camera up on them and yelled "CHEESE!" while she had been kissing him.

That man was Mu la Flaga.

"You left in a hole in my heart. Why did you have to die?" The empty space, not just in her heart, but in her life, gaped at her like a great chasm that she could fall into at any minute. A chasm filled with memories, happy memories, that she could relive, again and again, and be cut away from reality. Of course, she would die…but was death really so bad? She would be with Mu, that was for sure.

_Look at this photograph_

_Every time I do it makes me laugh_

_Every time I do it makes me…_

She held the photo by its frame, and smiled. The happy times she'd had would not matter now-they could never be relived. She needed to stay alive, as Mu would have wanted her to. That was the hard battle-to battle the void, and the spaces in her life, and maybe fill them, and enjoy living.

It was the battle she'd win, because she'd never lost. There may have been empty spaces. They may be too large, unfathomable spaces never to be filled. But they could be overcome, and left behind. And she would. She would overcome them, and become herself again.


End file.
